Friday, May 13, 2011

I Love You, Always and Forever Will

Words can not describe the pain and suffering in my heart. It saddens to hear you say, "I don't want to be with you." I'm still very much in love with you. In fact, I love you more than anything or anyone else in the world. But I guess I have to let you go. You mean the whole world to me. Now that you're gone, and with someone else, I can't see how I can go on in these difficult times. You've always made me smile when we were together. Now there's nothing left, but a shadow of some memories.

It feels like a thousand pins and needles stab my heart every time I think about you, and how we can no longer be together. I'm willing to do anything for you. Even this, as much as it hurts me. Because I love you unconditionally. I accept you for who you are, and what you have done. But you will never know this. I miss you so much.

As sad and depressed as I am in this time of grief, there is a bit of frustration in me. I was initially angry at the thought of you returning to your ex, because of your feelings for him. But then I found out that you two can not be together. For what reasons, I do not know. Now, at a mere two months since we've been apart, I am a bit frustrated that you're already interested in another man. But not just any man. Your sister's boyfriend's cousin. I think Andy is his name. There's something wrong with that, I don't like it. I hope you realise that if you two do go out, and find him to be a perfect match for you, then you two will be related in more ways than one.

But I can forgive you. I'll forgive you for everything you have done and what you will do. Because I love you, no matter what. If you think you will be happier with him, then I won't get in your way. I'll leave you alone for good, I promise. I won't bother you anymore with my troubles or my senseless feelings. You do not care for them anyways.

"I don't want to be with you."

Those words are still haunting me. But I still want you to know that as long as I breathe, I will always be here for you. If you ever need me, I will be here for you. Because I love you.

I love you...

Stay sharp,
K